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Super Psycho

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super psycho(n.) an immensely disturbed individual who is obsessed with ranting, whining, and blabbering about his life. severely unstable and emotionally undefined, a super psycho should always be dealt with at a distance greater than 50 feet and, with some few doses of aspirin.

WHO THE HELL IS SUPER PSYCHO?
Name:Empermeen Mallawee
Nickname:Elp, Elf, Elfer, Elper, Emper, Empermeen, Buknoy, Boknoy, Bok, Mallawee
Age: I am 15. And I mean it.
Address: Honestly?
Favorite Color: Green, Orange
Favorite Food: Rodic's Jumbosilog
Motto in Life: Abolish our selves.
Favorite High School Subject: Biology
Most Hated High School Subject: Values Education
Most Unforgettable Experience: When I abolished my self.
Most Embarrassing Experience: When I abolished my self.
Who is your Crush: My self.
Do you think autograph questions are dumb?: Super.
So why are you answering this?: Why do you care.
Ambition in Life: To be a Super star.
What is Love: Love is what you say when 'horny' doesn't sound right.
If you were a deodorant scent, what would you be?: Natural Scent.
Your film biopic's title would be: E-pal
One word that best describes you: Magnificent.
What can you say about PGMA?: She has a mole on her face.
How about Josepha Estrada?:His stomach is really big.
How about Angel Locsin?:Her face looks too small.
Your alter ego's name is: Kokey
Dedication: World Peace.
Any Last Words?: Rrrawwrr.

I'M EVERYWHERE!
We're Just Friends...ter
Yahoo Me, Yahoo You

GIMME MORE! MORE...BLOGS
Allan Habon
Riley Palanca
Aio Arzadon
Cess Carlos Leya Sumbeling

MY FANS SAY THAT...

A HISTORY OF PSYCHOSIS

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

disclaimer #3: no, i am not a wannabe surgeon. grey's anatomy is just so.. real.

change of mind

no 'life is deep' or 'lastikman-bashing' post for today. i found out that downloading and watching videos is actually one of my few tolerable addictions in life. i feel so tranquilized. was it heroes, or was it grey's anatomy. this is just stupid. i can't help overanalyzing tv show plots [perhaps that was why freaking lastikman irked me like hell]. but, it's just, saddening, and frustrating and depressing, i mean..they're like real people. shit. life is really unfair. why God?why?[this is getting emotional.]

grey world

the season's first episode was so-so. it tried so hard in giving out life-chaning quotations. however, the 2nd episode was really..real. [what the hell is with real?!] it's just so real. so real that i can't remove it from my system. this is sad. i'm supposed to be happy. but grey's anatomy is freakingly depressing. but it's nice. i don't know. weird.

i remember our socio10 class:

mam dionisio: hayy, heroes. ang ganda ng heroes noh? sino nanonood sainyo nun?

class: [almost all raise their hands]

mam dionisio: eh yung house? maganda rin noh? yan lng mga pinapanood ko eh. heroes at house.

kuya classmate: eh yung grey's anatomy mam hindi nyo pinapanood?

mam dionisio: grey's anatomy? puro hubaran lang naman yang grey's anatomy na yan eh.

me: [shet, uulitin ko tong subject na 'to!wahah]

CRISTINA YANG, M.D.: "Mrs. Burke, I am unique, unlike that loser, Lastikman, and I think your son is such a homo for leaving me! I don't care if I am Asian and he is black. Look at Tiger Woods, his mom is Vietnamese, his dad is black, but he is even more famous than you and your made-for-TV character! So cut the crap and go to hell because this is your last appearance on this show. So while your son is wallowing in misery because he's too messed up because of me, I will be sooo waiting for my next Emmy award."

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disclaimer #2: i do not watch lastikman regulary. since i was bored with the perpetual torrent downloads, i left my PC workplace and opted to watch TV. upon my horror, it was lastikman's turn at de-braining us viewers with its blatant dumbness.

epa-lastikman

gahd. why can't our TV producers grow up? and why on earth is lastikman such a piece of visual and intellectual crap?! why does vhong navarro invade the screen space with such stupidity and linearity? who is the show's script writer and i want to smack a logic book right unto his/her face! people, why are you tolerating viewer-stupidity with your dumbass plot and freakingly shallow cast of impish characters! lastikman is like, idiocy! gahd! translate it to bahasa or mongolian so at least i have a basis to disown that show! now!

tv review ba ito?

for the sake of calming myself down, allow me to dissect and deconstruct that airhead show, lastikman!

plot- lastikman bagets-mode lands on earth on a CGI spaceship and gets adopted by a weed-collector. he is a friggin loser, poor and gets bullied by his slut-ass mother who freaking hates her because he comes from another planet lightyears away!!!he likes this airhead chic who is full of ass and boy-loving but since he is a loser he doesn't stand a chance. add these bland sleep-inducing copycat characters and lastikman's life is your usual superhero hell! [or something like that]. pleeeeeeeeeeasssssse! would the script writers get some neurons?! how many times has this stupid shit of cheap literature been recycled?! can't you like get some more interesting turn of events, like, lastikman is actually an organism that sprung up from the oil deposits at saudi arabia?! don't you pity your filipino viewers? your feeding them with the same shit over and over again! you freakingly dumb people! sheeet!

vhong navarro as lastikman-okayy..let me be nicer on this one. as an actor, vhong navarro has no choice but to follow whatever the director or those who conceptualized the characters tell him to do. in this case, they are telling him to be as bland, stupid, imbecile, dumbass [i am running out of adjectives!] stereotypical, copycat, substandard as he could ever be on his whole showbiz career! and hooray! it works because vhong navarro looks like your worst nightmare for your brain-developing baby! he really is soooooooo usual, un-unique, bland and just...UN-original. honestly, i am already living on the philippine soil for 15 years and i have been seeing this shit recycled all over again! and now, lastikman! shit! it's already too dumb to even try copying things! gahd, this is high blood inducing!

iya villania as [who the hell she is]-warm congratulations to iya villania because she was effective in portraying a hard-to-get slut-slash-cheerleader who has her feeble brain filled with pathetic issues of love, boyfriends and body gyrations. congrats to you miss! you look as stupid as your character! shet! again, a copycat! i am just irked, irritated out of my wits whenever i see the same thing, the same characters with the same stupid copycat faces! who the hell are they fooling? do they think ms.villania's occasional twang would make her stand out from all the dumbass damsels she's copying! damn you stupid scriptwriters or whoever you are! get a freaking life.

the whole cast as [the whole cast]-i thought that streetboys dude has been flown off to africa or somewhere?! so why is he still there and why does his face look like it's perpetually swelling? why am i getting so freaking fed up with jake cuenca and his monotonous facial expressions and his irreversible lip protrusion?! shet! why, on earth, did they get a supporting cast as bland and as imbecile as their copycat lead characters! there is not even an inch of uniqueness!

lastikman is a recycled piece of dumbass rubbish! spare us all! please!

[no split-personality segment for today for my brain has been drained by its hatred towards the indescribable idiocy of lastikman. tama!]

LASTIKMAN: " Hi viewers, pahingi namang brain cells dyan!!!"

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Monday, October 29, 2007

disclaimer: i have a really dumb keyboard and an even dumber dsl connection. so whenever the connection is reset by the much dumber bayan DSL isp, the keboard stops encoding whatever i type. so that's why i have typos. and i am too lazy to correct them.

nagger

i went to the church yesteday. i think that is the politically correct statement of it: 'i went to the church'. because, in all honesty, i did not 'hear mass' and neither did i 'pay respect to the church'. nothing much was profound about it, i just 'went to the church'.

in high school, i thought that doubting things as complex and as spiritually-embedded as God, the Catholic church and human faith was an easy choice. since in the first place, one can easily deviate from what the majority believes in. in short, such doubt all boils down to 'being different' , to 'stand out', to be 'unlike the rest.' when in the exterior it seems so cool that you defy, essentially such doubt would only equate to self-glorification, the construction or reconstruction of an image, in short, selfishness. people would tell you 'ooh, so you don't go to church, you don't believe in God? well, you're so brave to have such a stand.' and then, you see the satisfaction of your 'deviation.'

partly, that was how i used to be in high school. i doubted things, and now i still do. however, it never occured to me that i must have my own sense of skepticism so that people would view me with such distinction from the usual bland existential patterns of other people. i just knew that there was something wrong with what people believed in.

now that i'm in college, especially, now that i have been immersed into the UP culture, i realized that doubting, or at least, the kind of doubt i have now is not bout image construction, or forging beliefs with a conscious intent at external perception. i have come into indignation that my doubting is an intellectual stand, respect to the boundlessness of truth, a deviation not from a collective belief, but a deviation from convenient fallacy. i doubt because there is something wrong, and yet this wrong will not make things easy for me. and so while i ponder on the harsh paradox of our existence [at least, sometimes, hahaha], many people choose not to doubt, and live such a convenient life.

and so, i went to church yesterday. it was my belief. but nothing more happened.

so? eh ano naman ngayon? so pumunta ka sa church pero hindi ka nagdasal, ama namin at anupamang ritwal?syempre ng dasal din ako. ang punto ko lng eh, wala saken yung belief nila na if go to church i will fulill obigations, i f i go to church i will be redeemed, if i go to church i will be spiritually enlightened. ohh...so, bakit ka pa pumupunta sa simbahan??!wala lang. kasi una, hindi mo maiiwasan na magi kang social being. man is a social being, we live in a society. so parang, if these people go to church because they believe in God, and if yes, at least i believe in God and we share the same belief, then i will go to church. ahhhhh....so kahit pala sa mormon eh pwede ka magsimba?hawbout sa iglesia?sa sabadista?oo naman. pero i will join them with only a sole thought in my mind, that we believe in god. pero on the other beliefs, i still have to make my own stand regarding them. sus, andaming eklat eh yun din lng pala punto mo, na you believe in God. may pa 'i went to-i went to church ka pa jan' eh. leche ka talaga!paki mo ba! kasama yun sa context eh!

AKAZUKIN CHACHA.leya was right, it would be better f i watched this one at crunchy roll, even if it looked awfully pixelated at full screen! hooray, i miss this anime, i used to watch it everyday when i was..er..9?[that was 6 years ago!whew!] yehey, yehey!

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Sunday, October 28, 2007

hoppy halloween

i am wondering why i am badly missing the days when MGB [magandang gabi bayan] had addictive halloween specials. the type where i am on the verge of virtual addiction and moral and spiritual doubt. i miss them because, first of all, they scared me as a child. and another, because TV shows these days, like Imbestigador, Jessica Soho and XXX, are just too proud to create a whole episode focusing on the supernatural.

it bothers me to think that the media has a certain sense of intellectual pride. one, because they no longer choose to feature issues that MGB once bravely presented, like witch craft, spiritual beings, white ladies. of course, it is right to say that such stories had been used and reused ad nausaeum in cheap or grand TV productions, thus nullifying the need [or use] of making others like them. however, when i say recreate shows or episodes on the supernatural, i do not mean copy materials of the past for the sake of having something new fed to the viewing public. what i mean is to continue our [okay, let me say it safely] cultural tradition of listening to supernatural tales and be spooked by them.

Imbestigador irked me, primarily, because it conveyed this air of intellectual quasi-omniscience. instead of what it claimed, that it investigated magic, the paranormal and the parapsychology, it merely basked itself into the glory of what it knows. imbestigador forged pictures, photoshopped images that seemed to have captured white ladies and ghosts in it, showed them to people, freaked them out then later on revealed to them that everything was an intentional hoax.

i am appalled by this act of trickery. i do not see the sense of 'soliciting their opinions and observing how they will react'. what i merely saw was a huge grin on the concept of the paranormal, an attempt of painting the supernatural as a big joke, another feeble attempt to laugh at man's devotion to what he does not know but he pretends to know. when in fact, it was imbestigador itself that pretended that they know what they were about to get from 'creating' their own sense of the supernatural.

uhmm.. okayy?? so whatsda point ba? na totoo ang ghosts and white ladies?? well, personally naniniwala ako sa kanila. bakit kamo? kasi naniniwala ako sa diyos, bakit kasi [mahaba ito!wag na magtanong]...so God is, well, to put it simply [kasi nga mahaba ang paliwanag ko rito] spiritual in nature as far as what we believe in, and so are imps, ghosts and ghouls, they're spirits-whatever. so naniniwala ako sa kanila. ahh okayy...so ganun lng pala yun. nabadtrip ka sa imbestigador kasi parang pinamukha nila sa mga manonood na pawang kasinungalingan, este, subjective reality lng ang mga mumu?? that's one, pero ang ikinagalit ko pa eh, 'para saan at kelangan nila gawin yung gagawa sila ng eklat tpos ipapakita nila'. ano gusto nilang palabasin, na man is so vulnerable? na kahit sila, dahil alam nila at may kapabilidad kuno silang intelektwal, kaya nilang gumawa ng paranormal? well.. una-oo, we can make our own concept of the supernatural, two-man IS vulnerable. so, technically wala silang dapat ipagpaumanhin sayo diba?! hindi yun. ang sabihin mo, masyado silang mayabang para i-admit na nirerecognize ng show nila that the supernatural COULD objectively, absolutely and ultimately exist. akala kasi nila kapag maniniwala ka dun, you're a man that lacks necessary reason. wag sila! don't even get me started with Spinoza and Plato! sus, ang yabang! mag spirit of the glass ka na nga lang jan! ah basta, leche sila!

Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN.i forgot which fellow kalaier told me to watch this film. anyhoo, i'm currently downloading it [awfully slowly] at bitlord. i heard it's quite..not child-friendly. wahaha. [but its profound daw...ooh..waww..]

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Saturday, October 27, 2007

bite me

i have my own musings today and i cannot put them into logical thought. i am mystified, in truth, by how blogging has become, or what form it tries to achieve. i wonder if, due to the course of the modifications it had been through, blogging has attained a certain stylistic position, or that it has established its own standards and unique form.i do not know what a blog post must be, or how i should start it, scribble it in the middle, and then what statements i must use to end it. i do not know what a blog must be, or if, ultimately, it has achieved an imperative to impose upon me a sense of compulsary stylistic conscience.

+++

my blog, i should say, has evolved from what it once before, and what it was originally forged for- something that will carry my thoughts, store them through time, and preserve them in whatever degree in can into conscious memory. it has been that ever since, and through such inital intent, i was able to, in my own judgment, create a blog so sensible and necessarilly serious. however, it was also due to this purposive intent that some have said that my blog has become too dark, serious, stiff and monocentric.

perhaps, it is of logic that a blog that seeks depth will incline towards such a monocentric view, and so, i have come into thinking that the multipersonal capability ofa blog, which is established by the fact that it is, after all, a fracture of the totality of the world wide web, is killed by the style i have been employing. the senselessness of life is ignored, the gravity of our own uncertainty is magnified into scales one would often shun. my blog has chosen to be sad. and yet, if it is sadness and desolation that reality would convey, then i submit to a lonely blog.

however, it is also my duty to reconstruct my days, my life and my memories into artifacts that not only should i find useful for the coming years, but also as artifacts that will enable me to be inspired and to see the often hidden and obscured joys of everyday.

yes, there is a sad blog, a serious blog that sucks you into the depth it tries to ponder on. i assure you that the truth is a boundless space, where emotions are merely illusions. but in this life, of truth or lies, whatever we choose, and even in a stupid, petty blog, joy is an invention.

our responsibility, thus, is to put in mind that if joy is our creation, it is also a skill that can be mindlessly manipulated by ourselves.

hayy. ang punto ko lng naman eh, bakit ba kelangan maging masaya ang blog? eh pano kung bad trip ka, kelangan ba you make fun of your anger?! hindi naman di ba? teka teka teka! sino naman nagsabing kapag badtip ka eh kelangan mong mag 'pretend' na masaya ka! bobo! kaya nga blog eh, kung asar ka eh di asar ka, at kung happy ka eh di happy ka! eps!wait! let me revise, ang punto ko eh: parang nagiging trend na sa mga blogs na ang outlook or mood nung post eh jovial, hindi naman talaga sa happy 'per se', i mean, na oobscure na yung gravity o worth nung particular moment na yun. parang it's stripped down into the framework, nawawala yung context, ginagawa nila yun para maging jumpy yung post, para maging light, ang point ko eh, naviviolate yaong total essence. sa bagay, pansin ko na nga rin yan, halos lahat ng blogs ngayon nag eevolve na. onga! korek ka jan! ganyan na inaadapt nilang klaseng post, yung light, quick, fast, in yourface style. eh teka! eh paki mo ba! yan gusto nila eh, ikaw nga rin ganyan na ginagawa mo! ulul. kaya nga sinulat ko 'to eh, parang pang-disclaimer ko, ahahah. lol. ingats. [insert smiley here]. mwaaahuggzz. mwaahuggzz din, bye fueeeh! mwaahuggzz uli!

eps na post.

huwwaaww.. so ano ito? it complements your post ha... profound! so what does t symbolize? awakening?rebirth?joy??

ulol. wala lang. kinuha ko lang iyan kay john dale. hahah.

weh.

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i'm my hero

just when i thought that heroes season 1 practically sealed the intensity of the whole series, i was just wowed by the newest season. shet. dsl is really a gift from God. i have downloaded the first four episodes already. [crap, i don't know how to play mp4 files, episode four was mp4,rhyming noh?]

that will basically sum up my activity for the next few days of this sembreak. addiction. downloading. cursing. swearing. i don't know, but DSL is a bit, slow. anyways, i still have to download a freaking mp4 player. yehey.

btw, pic above is hiro nakamura, my favorite character [he looks like jk]. wahahah. rrawwrr..

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Friday, October 26, 2007

whatta bisch.

it's not really about being bitter, or grade-conscious. but really, what the freaking hell are my prof's standards? because for one: she sounds stupid, two: she teaches really stupid things. that was an evil statement. but it's just unfair, that she had to reinforce whatever strict image she or her department is trying to build up by giving us these grades. shet. i sound dumb. they're just grades. i should already get used to this. [paparating na ang math!aaaaah!]pero, at least she could have recognized our own efforts, after all, we were all newbies. some UP profs are just...bad.

i'm going to have braces again. rrawwrr. i hate dentists, bad childhood memories.

my day is wrecked. my GWA will plummet down because of comm 3.

sana hindi kami magkasalubong ni mam. wahahahah.

hoo..ray..

finally, i now have my GWA. i think i computed it correctly. wahahah. at least it was higher than my worst case projection. shet, kaya nga worst case diba? pero pwede naman na yung nakuha mo eh sing worst nung worst case eh kasi nga may posibilidad na mangyari yung worst? kaya nga worst di ba? diba?????! [pero wait, sing worst ng worst? eh diba kung worst eh superlative na, so it has the highest degree na, so kung sing worst nung worst ang anumang worst na ito, ibig sabihin parehas sila ng degree, so hindi highest degree yung isang worst? eh pwede naman parehas silang highest degree eh! pero diba, hindi magiging unique ang 'worst' na 'to, therefore, hindi established na kung worst na, worst na talaga, kasi me sing-worst pa siya. therefore, if somebody says, worst na yun, you could never be really be sure diba???? dibaaaaaaa???!!!]

yehey! yehey!

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so delayed

because jk is such a slow oaf, it was just this 3am that i finally took hold of our pics from katkat's not-so-feminine debut at MoA. it was the last time we've seen each other for the past 10 months. that is just, dumb. i feel bored. must...go..out...

that's fun. even if i'm as odd as i am right now [and as i have ever been], they always stick around. [well..'always' is subjective].

ehrr. the computerized registration system [crs] moved its batch run to october 27. whatever, as if it will make any difference. i was mortified, however, by the 'grades viewing' section's newest layout! it had the names of the subjects i have not yet received my grades in displayed [as well as the enlisted subject for the next sem] freaky, it made me nearly collapse since i thought i'll finally be looking at REALLY bad grades. rrawwrr.

+++

late reaction: my hair looks like...bad hair. [sorry my brain sleeps at 4am. it's 4:43]

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Thursday, October 25, 2007

that's EVIL.

eff. and i thought i should be happy because i scored 110 during my last game of duckpin bowling, and it was even my 15th birthday! but lo and behold, when i opened my crs this noon, mr.diaz found it justifiable to give me 2.25! like, hell! i had three strikes for the whole semester [hmm...thinking about it..] anyways, lucky me because this is just PE, no weight on the GWA.hmf.

hooray DSL!

last week i was banging my head on the keyboard because of pathetic dial up connections. the day before yesterday, i was incarcerating my being because of way, way more pathetic dial up connections from GO! yesterday, we applied for Bayan DSL. and today, hooray! hooray! we now have DSL connection! how convenient.. i'm so happy that i'm downloading the first four episodes of Heroes season 2. fun. now i have the right to go youtube-ing. yebah.

ulul

highlight of the day:

i was in mcdonald's sm north edsa munching some hyper-oily quarter pounder when i spotted this effing imp from UP. hell, he was wearing our ID strap, the one you could buy from SC with its prominent 'university of the philippines' flashing out of the dark maroon shade.

i was, like, fuck you. why the hell was he even wearing ID or an ID strap in freaking SM north edsa? shet, it's gaddamn sembreak! will you not be allowed inside malls if you don't have your freaking UP ID?! honestly! i don't even wear my ID when going to classes, even if the guard at a.s keeps on bullying me like shit. grrrr!

i have this thing against ID straps. i have a classmate in socio10, who, because of his lacking intellect and overreaching ego, had to wear his 'philippine science-main campus' ID strap come his turn in reporting, because he sounded so dumb and rehearsed! perhaps it was his way of compensating for his virtual mediocrity! honestly. and i, coming from a public high school in albay, had to invest on my saliva just to get my prof's nod during the report. and he freakng gets it with a stupid ID strap. the hell with them!

burn those ID straps! burn them!

ehrr. i often scare my own self..hmm..

+++

ang eff-eff naman. is it me or is bayan dsl just LAME. i have been downloading heroes season 2 episode 1 for 4 hours already. gahd!

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Wednesday, October 24, 2007

hooray, hooray CRS

thinking about it, the only time i feel happy checking my crs is when there's a new uploaded grade. otherwise, whenever i look at the expanse of the 20 subjects i am desperately trying to enlist in, i feel so hopeless and oppressed by the university system. really.

anyways, hooray. my grade for my favorite subject was finally displayed at crs. that's fun. but it disturbs me to think of the day i shall see my grades for math11 and comm3. i might faint in total chronic depression. [eeyng, ang GC?] how evil of them. i paid three freaking thousand pesos and they give me a really bad grade. rrawwrr.

socio10-i have been endorsing Ma'am Josephine Dionisio like hell lately, fondling for the most convincing adjectives i could find. she's smart, deep and efficient. plus, she's hilarious, her jokes are too sarcastic that you feel like you have no choice but to laugh [wait, is that good or bad?] anyway, get her! socio10, however, i checked crs and she won't be handling any GE this sem. weehee.

CRS crap-results for the 2nd run of CRS will be out on october 26, and i feel..so..excited. i got two subjects for the 1st run. and hooray, i got kuya karlo saguin. [wahahah..] i think i've posted how my preenlisted subjects list looks like. it's quite..red. heck, i've preenlisted for 20 subjects. i'll scorn CRS if they give me another 6 units. [optimistic mode: oh yes, i will have the most comfortable schedule next sem!]

boohoo

i am in texting mode with my classmates now. they said they had a mini-reunion in legazpi last monday, that they are planning an outing and that they will have a small gathering come friday. i am appalled. i should be there. they should get me outta here! i shall be back!

[hey, why are we not complete in this pic? oh i know, i'm not friends with everyone!wahaha!]

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days and mornings

my life is turning upside down because of sembreak.

did you know that when i came back to our QC apartment, i packed my dorm things inside a large garbage bag?

it was weird but it was really convenient. i mean, eff, a garbage bag is just 10 pesos, and it's big enough to carry things. so instead of buying those thicker plastic bags with pooh prints, i deemed it more sensible to buy a garbage bag. honestly.

and besides, the only time a garbage bag becomes a garbage bag is if theres a freaking garbage inside it. too bad, though, i was not able to copy the picture of my baggage that i took with john dale's cam. anyways, carrying a garbage bag everywhere isn't that bad. the only times i had to carry my things were through the kalai lobby and then a few meters towards the apartment. the only trouble i had was with the taxi driver.

me: manong, mindanao avenue po.

manong: sige.

me: [loading the bag]

manong: [looking at the garbage bag] o anu 'yan?

me: [laughing] gamit ko po, nakakatamad mag impake eh.

weh. manong was so freaked out, what was he thinking, i was bringing with me a dead body? so then i had to murder someone from kalai?! [hmm..thinking about it..] anyways, i haven't unpacked everything yet. blah. i'll go back to kalai anyway...unless, somebody doesn't want to see me again next sem.[quote:"honestly, i don't like you."] weh.

life is so boring. unlike kid robot here, yehey yehey.

that is so weird, though. how can a freaking teddy

bear take the shape of a rabbit?! anyways they're so

...uhm, unique, that i'm uploading them everywhere

for no reason at all!

yehey!

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(0) choo choo

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

oh so scandalous...

i remember a fellow kalaier who asked me how life went on at the male wing, if it was rowdy, messy and all those usual description on the male lifestyle. all i could say was, 'uh, why not live with us and see for yourself?'

of course that was a wrong answer because she was a girl! gahd. if i knew better i should have shown her this pic taken during our usual tambays at b-123.

i'm so evil, why did i even post this. haha. too bad i had to censor *****'s face. he had an equally shocking facial expression.

this is so depressing. i feel so useless. if i don't go back home soon enough, i might die of sloth, or gluttony. whenever i become conscious of this seasonal depression, i start eating things. i'm getting fat again, or so i think. no..make that, i'm getting hysterical. aaargh. so now i know sembreaks are--freaky.

speaking of sloth, i dug up this picture from my kalai vault, courtesy of john dale. look at me, i miss my hair. wahaha. anyways, this was taken before the general inspection. i was forced to scrub the floor for the first time since 2nd year high school. slavery. if only it was clear enough, you'll notice how tired-looking my floormates were, since they were so unlucky to be assigned to clean the common areas. while I, because i am not a hands-on person, just came from a leisurely walk-around-the-campus when this shot was taken.

which reminds me. i hate general inspections.

hooray.. i have taken hold of our photobooth picture from the trinoma escapade and tweaked it a bit. it's just too bad that it has that ugly gay border. we should really follow instructions next time.

i look too white there. hmm..

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mabuhay, mabuhay

i don't really know, but i decided to totally revamp my layout since the green thing is getting a bit boring. i like it this simple. but, [insert cuss words here], making it look simple is not even that simple. anyways, a gazillion thanks to leya and her dsl connection for helping me out at times when GO! dial up becomes a total dickhead. thanks! [disclaimer: i am not always this nice.]

it's october 23 and i feel so bum. i want to ride a rocket and zoom off to albay right this very moment. i miss my freakshow classmates [ahahaha]. my father, when he came here at Q.C, asked me to spend my sembreak in Mindoro where he is currently working. but quickly i told him it was not where i grew up, so why would i even go there? i don't even speak mangyan. [i really need an anti-racism counselling.]

wew. i feel so detached. while i sit my ass off here all day, waking up at 4 in the afternoon and sleeping at 4 in the morning, my classmates are back home in albay having conversations over burger yums and strolling at the city like our former province-brewed selves.

i really miss biking around tabaco, since the motorists there are still spiritually in touch to give a bit of patience.

i miss going to jollibee since i didn't have any other option.

i miss sleeping at the wee hours of the night while ignoring ghastly foot steps at the backyard.

i miss walking to school while listening tothe national anthem being hurled in the air.

i miss stirring up evil thoughts about my classmates.

i miss ignoring my enemies whenever we meet at the city pavements.

i miss standing on a spot somewhere in the city, looking at everything bumming around against time.

i miss tabaco and its rural stagnation.

i miss the trees.

i miss its fresh, laidback air.

i miss mayon's outline and its ubiquitous image.

i miss the people.

i miss the tabaco landscape. it's just full of memories.

oooh. emo.

shit. i don't even have my high school pictures with me.

[insert: Michael Buble's 'Home']

+++

weeeeee. it feels odd blogging with this new layout. hmm..

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Sunday, October 21, 2007

yey. tatlong subjects na lang at pwede na ako mag-compute ng GWA. whehehe.

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Saturday, October 20, 2007

Question: Would you rather do the right thing and be sad or the wrong thing and be happy? Why? (How does one justify one's choice and how does one come to terms with the incumbent feeling?)

If I choose to be right, it means I have satisfied the moral expectations of the people around me, and most probably, my own moral expectations as well. The error is that whenever we say ‘right’ we expect that it follows that we find ‘pleasure’ in doing this ‘right’ thing. When in fact, a right thing basically means something that is done in accordance with a set of values, and doing them does not mean it will give pleasure to any human being that chooses to do this ‘right’ thing.

The question provides that even though I am right, I am still sad. Therefore, this right action I have done did not give me any sense of pleasure, from which I will conclude that this ‘right’ action does not abide by my nature, it does not preserve me, it contradicts me (since anything that does not preserve us contradicts us, this is not false dichotomy, if there would be anything in between, that is just like saying that there are ‘absolutely meaningless, useless’ actions that exist in this world). If it contradicts my nature, it is, in truth, ‘wrong’ for me. However, since I believe my society and its moral beliefs, I seem and choose to think that this action is ‘right’, but in the end, I am still sad.

And so I reaffirm, I would rather be wrong but happy.

i was browsing through my word files when i came upon my final paper for philo. above is an excerpt.

it never fails to spark arguments. at least, in kalai ffb.

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Friday, October 19, 2007

since the idea of mixing first floor girls and first floor boys seems perfectly complementing [and fateful], one would expect hard-core [suggestive?] bonding. and when we say bonding we mean irrational obsession to substandard sounds, limited salty food and total disregard to house rules. and so when mykol, our correp, decided that his testosterone was actually telling him to put up a sem-ender bash, everyone in the corridor was obviously thrilled at the thought.

john dale started browsing through his collection of digital images for the keepsake, and the foodcom was preparing some sort-of palatable-slash-edible food. and when the party came, everyone looked stupid, in a good way.

obviously i liked the tuna sandwich. the juice was too warm though.

what made me laugh the most, and even up to this moment, was aldrin's humorific attempt at decent dance steps. he was doing this hypermorphed egyptian choreography with involuntary muscle contractions. someone said :"nangingisay na ata yan ah!"

by this time, aldrin already slept. so wilmar and i tried imitating his,er, unique choreography. the muscle contractions weren't natural though. too bad.

the sem-ender did not end after this picture. the sound people started playing mushy sounds afterwards, and so the loveless kalaiers felt they did not belong and opted to sleep instead [that included me]. but of course the party people went up really late. they waited for the first batch of breakfast at the dining hall.

sigaw-aw

and so after hapless prodding, innumerable delays and the whole weird drama, sigaw's first issue was finally released. leya had to use all her aesthetic resources to get the printing press guys rushing to her rescue as we hurried for the release. and when it was done, we posted it on the TV area and sold a few individual copies in between shameless picture-takings

the copies were all sold-out. which reminds me, we forgot to upload the pdf file to deviant art. too bad. dhadi looks somehow like a girl and somehow like a boy.which is it?hehe.carla looks big. leya looks harrassed. daniel looks like a passerby. haha. i look, er, stoic.

sembreak blues

we knew we had to go somewhere before the thought of a sem break actually breaks into our system. so some of the first floor boys who were available that time decided to break free from the monotony of that side of the UPD campus and get a 'real life' at Trinoma.

me: yehey, may social life na tayo. sila: wala ba? me: night life meron din. sila:wehe. me: ang night life lang natin ay SC, coop at first floor corridor.

if you have a john dale with you, with his ubiquitous digicam, a james autor who knows what must be done and then camwhores like us, you'll get directed [aka, fake] pictures like this one. we were at trinoma park, enjoying the oddity of the landscape. when we were strolling, i realized how much UP got into our sytem. as far as i know, we never had the luxury of such man-made aesthetics, we just immersed ourselves into acads and our floor-bonding. but never with these mall brouhaha and comfy air-conditioned mini-universe. it was really fun, though. it balanced our states of mind. haha.

james: ganitong pose naman.

jd c.: ang bading naman.

me: nakikita ba yung havs ko?

oswald: nababading na ang first floor boys.

lahat: [nagpa-picture pa rin]

and now,

it's sem break. i feel really dormant.

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Thursday, October 18, 2007

a math-less perspective.

yey. my first two uno's. pagbigyan habang wala pang math.wahaha.

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Saturday, October 13, 2007

i swear to everyone that if i again get 6 freaking units after the 2nd run of CRS, i'll burn diliman with a single matchstick.

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Saturday, October 06, 2007

Don't Touch!:
surreal epalism

it was a harsh, depressing, exhausting, EVIL, chemical, deutsch, mathematical week.

i spent the whole sunday finishing our materials for our philo report. i made letters, placed them on cartons, researched spinoza, sucked in his arguments of evil, and then slept.

monday, i spent reviewing for math 11, only to find out that the exam was rescheduled to saturday. it was good, though, since i had time to get all the photocopies for my chem1 exam. tuesday, i reviewed whatever handout i had for chem1 [which was 3 out of 8]. then, the afternoon was a headache since our prof in german congested our two-week lesson for an hour.

luckily, my wednesday has become a free day since our p.e, duckpin bowling, ended a week before [i will miss you group mates, huhuhu] due to my now absurd bod clock, i woke up at 1pm, skipped bath and took an ikot ride to chem pav to get the other photocopies. while i was waiting for manang, i couldn't help but notice how ancient her photocopying machine was. too ancient that she had to unscrew things, brush stuffs and press and fondle wires just to get the machine going. later, i met my philo groupmates for our final class report. and we had to sing a morphed version of 'ako ay pilipino' by francis m. at a.s lobby.

chemigrrry

now, i love chemistry so much i want to shift to either chem or chem.eng. however, that wouldn't be too probable.

our last exam was,er, nice. it was unexpectedly easy coming from our 'not-so-nice' prof. [whats with 'nice'?!] shit, how come from those pages and pages of photocopies, i never managed to know what the brain-enhancing vitamins are [i hope though, that they are the B-vitamins, i hope] when i was taking the exam, i remembered mam bitare when i was already on the bonus questions. 'the law states that it is illegal for 1st and 2nd degree relatives to marry. what is the scientific basis for this?' prof's question was vague though. what does he mean by 'marry', if they marry would that necessarily mean that the female will be impregnated?! why couldn't he just say, 'copulate' or 'have sex' or 'fuck'? anyway, i remembered mam because she was the one who first explained to me the reason behind that way back in 2nd year, aww, nostalgic.

the weirdest question however was:

kapag ang labada, kinula, maputi. and labandera umiitim pag binabad sa araw, ang labada, pumuputi

while i was reading that i was like, 'waddahek?'

and so i asked prof and he said that it was like: bakit ang labandera pag naarawan umiitim, ang labada pumuputi? and so i just said, ah okeeey sir, and he laughed, perhaps he realized the humor in his test questions. weird humor.

philosophy is evil

our philo report went on really well. our topic was 'dicrimination by thought is evil' 'discrimination against muslims is part of our reality'

mam sj said it was good that we were able to insert philosophy on the subject matter. it was the last meeting for philo 1. i loved that class. i will miss them as well.

deutsch blues

german is gone. and i feel happy about it. however, again, i loved that class too. i will miss my seatmates and mam valera, who is just unbelievably kind. i scored 50/50 for the last exams, which doesn't necessarilly make it a perfect score. it means i just answered the 2 bonus questions incorrectly. too bad. anyways, argh. sad, i miss german. emo.

i loooove math

i saw a vandal on a seat at math building yesterday. it was a comic strip with some unsolicited comments written all over it. it was so funny that i suddenly laughed loudly during class. wahahha. i'm gonna take a photo of that some day. perhaps during finals.

our 3rd exam was smooth-flowing. i managed to avoid another nervous breakdown. it just pains me to think that the last problem was just too impossible for my not so-flexed brain. bummer.

cam whore

inside b-123, john dale's and rico's room.

me: ang cute ng new hairstyle ko.

sila: weh.

me: nyahahah! piktyuran mo nga ako john dale.

jd: vain.

me: piktyuran mo 'ko.

and so..this is just too vain.

my new hairstyle feels way lighter though, compared to how rowdy it was for the last four months:

i'm rethinking of having my hair dyed green. parang masaya. but that would also mean receiving no allowance for the rest of my life. ouch.

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