anyway, brushing aside this whole heart drama, i want to tell this unfair universe that i kinda luhrved the banahaw field trip. it's actually somehow weird, you see, i'm a jaime licauco reader, and so my perception of banahaw is really, ehrr, supernatural. and so walking around the whole mountain, [walking sounds so oversimplistic, hmff], crawling through mossy stone formations and asphyxiating yourself through crevices felt different when seen from an academic perspective, which isn't bad, i guess. hmm...

warever.

blurry and bad hair day photos of my banahaw happiness are now on my yummy multiply site. stalk me!

my friend tells me i'm depressed, and so i go, like, 'i am?' this is actually something new, people. i call it 'depression by dictation', and i want to share this experience with my psychology classmates this coming thursday. ehrr, wait. we're not that close pala. bad idea.anyhoo, anyhow, i still cannot expel vivid images of my banahaw trip hours ago, it's just pure happiness, hotness and, uhm, holiness. i want to go back there someday with skimpy swimming trunks for my sta.lucia falls 'cleansing'. ehrr, disturbing.

i really want to open up the love topic but it kinda gets boring when i contemplate and picture myself as a, uhm, 'love person.' gahd, is it really that bad? even though, HONESTYLY, i have no decent, realistic love life at any emotional proximity whatsoever, i like to think that i have one, wala lang, it makes me feel, ehrr, so normal.

speaking about love, life and luhrve life, i badly need a good haircut.

lately i have been doing things which are kind of 'un-me'. like, uhm, having a pseudo-love life, which is imaginary by the way, thus making it even much worse. my math woes are getting a bit papansin and haggard again, but i have conditioned my 'locus of control' to make me persevere and triumph over the odds of this harsh, super harsh education system.


back to the love life thing, i'm actually letting it go. i realized that i'm only tiring myself whenever i burn my ass meditating, visualizing and praying to the Gods of humanity to give me an effing non-academic feeling. it's also kind of a hassle vandalizing armchairs, walls and CR's [exag] just to pronounce my, ehhr, emotions. warever.


and so here i am, academic, scholastic, intellectual and all, trying to burn my worth in studying applications of trigonometric functions [ehrkehr], promoting jerrie abella, trying to like org life, keeping updated with my corridor life and, basically, trying to live 'single'. what the hell is my problem anyway?


i find it utterly redundant to post pictures on my blog when i already have a very productive multiply site. and so to check out accompanying visual experiences to my happiness college living, just click on my supah delicious multiply account. i really love college life. perhaps this is my one, true love life. ugh. warever again.


i feel like i'm living in way, bigger world. i was egged by another realization lately, i want fulfillment, i mean, a human kind of fulfillment, one that goes beyond mere uno-harvesting and academic brouhahas. i'm growing up, i think i need to go beyond the classroom and roam the world, learn life, give something to people. the world is just, beautiful, college life is much more sensible now. i honestly believe i have better plans now. i think so.


gahd. freaky. i start this post with my bitter-y love life and end it with my life plans, what a bummer.


i will wait, though, but i will no longer be disillusioned.